March 23, 2004

"whatever happened to macaroni and cheese?" my sister jennifer asks.

the fucktard teenagers who live downstairs from us set the building on fire when they decided to flambe a pan of shrimp with drambuie (or however the hell you spell it). i am covered in huge gashes and scratches from getting my cats into their carry cases so we could escape down the back stairs - the alarms make them completely hysterical. in the end the fire never made it to our floor thank goodness, but our hallway was filled with so much smoke that the 4 steps from my door to the back porch nearly seared my lungs. i'm still choking this morning.

the worst thing was zoran forcing me to leave the apt without him because we couldn't find bonk, and there was no way he was going to leave the apt without her, or let me stay to help him. i've never seen anything so utterly beautiful as zoran coming out the door with the kitten about 10 min later. seemed like a lifetime.

the other apt looks like someone set off a few rocket launchers in it and there's a massive hole behind their stove, with an even bigger blast pattern around it. those shrimp went off like a freaking bomb...! that's how we knew there was something wrong, before the alarms went off, there was this huge bang from downstairs.

so besides the cat scratches (some of which are on the backs of my legs, to give you an idea of how freaked my cats were. at one point finn was about 2 feet over my head having launched himself out of my grip) i have a sprained wrist from wrestling the cats into their carriers and i really badly bruised my right knee cap - from hitting the floor really hard and fast to catch finn after zoran flushed him out from under the bed.

you know kids, there's a reason why they TEACH the art of flambe in SCHOOLS... because not every ass-hat in his or her own home is capable of doing it without some in-fucking-struction. hello...?

oh and in case you're wondering (and you won't be if you actually know me), yes, i had a few pointed words with said teenagers after it was all said and done. i even made one of the boys cry. he got off easy.

March 06, 2004

omg... no, No, NOOOOO...! 10 or more years without a new gojira film... screee-onk :-(